It's All Coming Back To Me Now
by S2moviefreak123
Summary: My second attempt at an AU fic about Fiona drinking the potion. Chapter 8 added!
1. Two Kisses and An Arrest

"Two Kisses and an Arrest"

A/N: Ok, this is my second attempt at this AU fic. It is completely different than my first one, although it is still about what would have happened if Fiona had taken the potion. I have thought this one through, so you can be sure that I will finish it this time. Almost all of the characters are in this chapter, some more than others. I can guarantee that they will each have bigger parts in future chapters. Hope y'all enjoy.

Disclaimer: All characters and plot from Shrek 2 belong to Dreamworks, not me.

"NO!!" Shrek screamed in horror, sinking to his knees. At first, he refused to believe that Charming had kissed her. Things like that couldn't happen to true love. They just didn't. Shrek kept his eyes set on Fiona, praying that she would move away from Charming. Or better yet, that this was just a really bad dream, and soon he would wake up, having never come to Far Far Away. It didn't take but a few seconds for him to realize that this was real, and no amount of hoping or praying could change that.

Shrek had to turn his head away as Fiona returned Charming's kiss with a much more passionate one. Tears were forming behind his eyes, but he didn't cry. After all that he had been through, after all of the pain and heartbreak, he was still unable to cry. He chanced a glance in the direction of the new......lovers..... his eyes beholding his true love still in Charming's embrace. Never had Shrek felt so heartbroken. This hurt more than anything had ever hurt him before. Even when Fiona left for Duloc with Farquad, at least Shrek had had the ability to DO something about it. Now....he was just....helpless. He had never been helpless before and, honestly, it scared him.

As Shrek averted his eyes once again, he noticed the king and queen standing only a few yards away from him. He was brought back to the conversation that Harold, the Fairy Godmother, and Charming had shared that afternoon, and what Harold had agreed to do. His sorrow slowly began turning into outrage. Suddenly, Shrek rose to his feet and turned towards King Harold.

"This is all your fault!" Shrek thundered, pointing at the king.

Harold began to speak, but Shrek was not finished.

"What kind of father could do this to their DAUGHTER!" Shrek yelled angrily, hardly aware of the hundreds of eyes set on him, two of them belonging to Fiona. She had pulled away from Charming's embrace slightly to have a better view of the confrontation her father was having with this obviously angry man.

As for Harold, he attempted to defend what he had done, telling Shrek that he was doing what was best for Fiona, but he was not sure that he believed it himself. He had regretted giving Fiona the potion the moment Charming's lips touched hers, because it was at that moment he realized how it would change, and maybe even ruin, Fiona's life forever. Shrek was angry, and Harold couldn't blame him.

"All we wanted was your blessing," Shrek said in a much more quiet and hurt tone. "Or at least she wanted it. Instead, you try to kill me and then you do this," Shrek pointed in the direction of Fiona and Charming. He was near tears, but he would not cry in front of Harold or Charming, and he definitely wouldn't break down in front of Fiona.

Fiona had been watching the scene with interest. Was this man talking about her? He did seem to be looking her way more times than was comfortable. She looked to Charming for an answer, and was suprised to see an amused smile on his face. When he acknowledge her stare, and returned it, his smile was replaced by a look of less than sincere concern.

"Muffincake, don't worry about that," Charming said soothingly, pointing in Shrek's direction, "Who could blame him for being jealous?"

Charming began to laugh softly, and although Fiona didn't quite know why, her concern faded. She once again embraced Charming, and as he returned it, he looked humorously at the scene that was unfolding only a few yards away. Shrek had ceased his yelling, realizing that it was futile, and simply looked from Harold, to Fiona and Charming, to the Fairy Godmother, and back. He looked as if he didn't know what to do. Charming decided to help him out.

"Ogre, you need to go away and leave me and my girl alone," Charming said harshly.

That was all it took. Shrek didn't give Charming any time to think before he had him pinned on the ground, seething. Before anybody around them had a chance to move, the two were engaged in a full-fledged fist fight. Now, this scene would have seemed extremely childish if it had not been for the horrifying look of anger and hatred in both Shrek and Charming's eyes. The fight, however, did not last any more than five seconds when both Fiona and the Fairy Godmother started coming towards Shrek to help Charming. Fiona made it first.

"GET OFF OF HIM!" she yelled at Shrek, attempting to seperate him from Charming. The minute Fiona touched him, Shrek was broken out of his trance of hatred and brought back into reality. Then, when he realized how stupid, if not satisfiying, what he was doing was, The Fairy Godmother did not need to come to Fiona and her son's aid for Shrek immediately scrambled to his feet. Due to the sudden halting of the brawl, both ends of the fight had not suffered any serious injuries That is, until Fiona stared angrily at Shrek for a few seconds before slapping him cleanly across the face.

Any anger that Shrek had felt before instantly melted away, replaced by a sorrow that went far beyond words. What had this potion done to her? Sure, she loved Charming now, but why would she take his side over the other man she........

Shrek was suddenly struck with an awful thought, which he feared was also the awful truth. It was one thing for Fiona to love Charming, but Shrek couldn't handle the possibility that maybe Fiona had lost her love for him, as well. Blinded by desperation and without thinking, Shrek pulled Fiona close to him and kissed her. Maybe there was a small amount of that love potion left for him. This was an action that he would soon regret, but he couldn't think about the consequences of it just then, for it was probably the only hope he had of ever getting Fiona back.

That hope was shattered, however, when Fiona shoved Shrek forcefully away from her. Her eyes were ablaze with anger, but there was something else that flashed briefly in them that Shrek could not recognize. Although he could not tell what it was, it got his attention.

"Fiona, I love you. Please tell me you still love me, too," Shrek pleaded with her. He could not give Fiona up without a fight. They had gotten through too much for him to give up now.

"I love Charming," Fiona said quietly, but fiercely.

"I know you do, sweetheart," Shrek continued to plead with her, in the most loving voice he had ever spoken in, " but you've got to still love me too. Don't you?"

"I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!" Fiona yelled back at him.

It was then that Shrek finally realized that he had lost. Fiona not only lost her love for Shrek, she had forgetten him. Shrek continued to gaze into Fiona's angry eyes, frantically trying to figure out a way to fix this. He didn't get much time to think before he heard Charming, who had been watching everything in stunned silence, finally find his voice.

"Guards!!" he commanded, "Arrest that man!!"

The royal guards looked to King Harold, for they would only take orders from the king and queen. Harold then looked up at the Fairy Godmother, who looked from Charming to Shrek and then nodded to Harold, silently commanding him to do so. Harold sighed as he looked from the Fairy Godmother, to Lillian, to Shrek, who was still staring at Fiona, but eyeing the guards as well. Realizing that no good would come from doing otherwise, Harold reluctantly motioned the guards to arrest the poor ogre. Queen Lillian eyed Harold incredulously, but decided that it was best to wait until they were alone to protest. She just watched as the guards started walking briskly towards Shrek.

Before the guards could get far however, Donkey, Puss, and the rest of Shrek's friends sprang into action. They had been watching Shrek and Fiona in silence, knowing that there was nothing that they could do for their friend. They finally found a way to be useful, and that was by keeping the guards away from Shrek. This was easier said than done, however. For the guards were very well trained and there were about five times as many than had been at the drawbridge a while ago. They, not unlike that afternoon on "Knights", took them all into custody rather quickly.

"Get them out of here!!" the Fairy Godmother yelled. She had been silent, which was not like her at all, through almost everything so far. She decided that it was time to take charge.

The guards forced all of Shrek's friends out the door, and locked it behind them. Shrek still kept his gaze set on Fiona.

"Now, hurry up and arrest him," the Fairy Godmother said, wanting to get Shrek as far away from Fiona and Charming as possible.

As the guards made their way towards him, Shrek reluctantly tore his gaze from Fiona. He had not even noticed his friends attempting to fight off the guards for him, although it wouldn't really matter at the moment if he did. The only thing that mattered was Fiona, and if he did not find a way to get her back now, he never would. As two guards took hold of each of his arms, Shrek grew desperate, pleading futilely with Fiona and trying to fight off the guards at the same time.

"Fiona, I'm Shrek, your husband," Shrek began to call out in desperation as more and more guards began to drag him further and further from his true love.

Shrek was reminded of Fiona and Farquad's wedding, where royal guards had attempted to separate Shrek from Fiona, while both of them called out for each other. The only difference was that Fiona did not call out for Shrek. Instead, she stood where she had been standing when he had kissed her, staring at him with the same angry eyes.

"You have to remember me! Say that you love me," Shrek begged her, "Say it!!"

She never did say the words as Shrek was taken away from the ball. Neither did she say them when he was thrown into prison for the second time that night. Hanging from the wall in the dungeon, where he had been that afternoon, he thought about everything that had happened in the last.....had it really only been three days? Shrek painfully realized that just as quickly as Fiona had been given to him, she had been taken away. The dark, dreary loneliness of the dungeon, along with the events of that evening were too much for even Shrek to bear, and for the first time since Shrek could remember, he began to weep.


	2. Between a Rock and a Hard Place

"Betweena Rock anda Hard Place" 

"What were you thinking, Harold?!" Queen Lillian scolded her husband. She had been quiet during the ball, not wanting to cause a scene, but it was time for Harold to tell her the truth. The entire ball had been one big, confusing mess, and Harold expected her to just stand by and pretend that nothing had happened? He should know her better than that. Of course, it seemed that she didn't know him that well, either. Never in her wildest dreams could she imagine him doing something as awful as what he did at the ball.

"What were you thinking?" she repeated in a furious, yet much quieter, voice.

"Well, you see Lillian........" Harold started to say, but stopped. He knew that he had been wrong to give Fiona the potion, and wrong to have had Shrek arrested, but what was he supposed to do? He was afraid of the Fairy Godmother, and the last thing he wanted to do was go against her wishes. Lillian, however, was giving him reason to be intimidated, as well.

"Lillian, I'm sorry...." The king said, for he really meant it, "but what did you expect me to do?"

"Just tell me this," Lilliansaid aspatiently as she could, ignoring Harold's question, "was the man you arrested the REAL Shrek, or was he pretending, too?" She said the last part of her statement sarcastically. She knew the answer to her own question, of course, but she wanted to see if her husband was dumb enough to lie to her.

"Um...well," Harold was tempted to lie, but he decided that it would be best not to, "No, he was the real Shrek."

"And I'm guessing that the man with Fiona was Charming," Queen Lillian said.

"Yes, that was Charming," Harold said, not suprised that Lillian had figured it out, "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you before, but I didn't think you would let Charming take Fiona to the ball if you knew the truth. I just wanted her to give him a chance." Harold was trying his best to avoid the truth without actually lying to his wife.

"Harold!! Whether you like it or not, Shrek is Fiona's husband," Lillian tried to talk some sense into her husband, "did you think that bringing Fiona and Charming together and arresting Shrek would change that?"

"Well..not exactly," Harold said, trying not to find a way to not reveal how much power the Fairy Godmother actually had over him, "And that's not the reason I arrested him. He...uh.....he attacked Charming. Yeah, that's why I had him arrested."

Harold thought that he had actually found a good excuse for his actions, even though it was mostly a lie. Of course, as he knew, his wife was not going to let him off the hook that easily.

"Prince Charming was kissing his wife, Harold," Lillian shouted in exasperation, "I think our son-in-law had the right to be a little angry!!"

When Harold didn't respond, Lillian continued..

"Why did Charming kiss Fiona, Harold?" Queen Lillian questioned, "and why did she return it, even after she realized that he wasn't her husband?"

"Well, um...." Harold struggled to find an answer.

"And why didn't you do anything to stop him, if you knew who he really was all along?" Lillian interrupted.

"Well.....you see, Lillian," Harold struggled even more to find an answer to this question.

"And what was our son-in-law talking about when he said that this was all your fault?" Lillian said, giving Harold a warning glare. Finally she ceased her questioning, giving Harold a chance to answer, and if he lied to her one more time.....he was going to be in deep trouble.

Figuring that there wasn't really a way to lie to her, Harold decided to tell her the truth, for once. He recalled everything, from the hitman to the potion. At first his wife became angry, but when Harold finished talking, she was justdisappointed. How could her husband, whom she had been married to for quite a while, do something like this? Standing by and letting all of this happen was bad enough, but it was hard to accept the fact that he had planned it all. After a moment of taking in what her husband had told her, she found her voice again.

"Harold...." Lillian said, in a voice that was suprisingly quiet, "You know what you need to do, don't you?"

"Yes..." Harold started, " but....."

"Then I expect you to do it," Lillian interrupted, still eerily quiet. Lillian had never been this angry before in her life.

Before Harold could respond, Queen Lillian turned towards the door, shaking her head with a sad look in her eyes. Then, without a word, she walked into the hallway. She was going to give Harold one last chance to redeem himself, and if he failed to do so, she didn't know what she would do.

* * *

Shrek stared pensively at the wall that stood in front of where he was hanging. Ever since his brief cry after being brought to the prison, it was all he had left to do. Without Donkey or Puss, whom he was suprised he missed so much, he was all alone. That is, except for the prison guards who, ever since Shrek and his friends' first escape, had been keeping a very watchful eye on him. Not that he was going anywhere, even if he could. Where was he supposed to go? 

At first, he was suprised when he did not turn back into an ogre at midnight, until he remembered kissing Fiona inhis pathetic attempt to get her back. It's not like it mattered what he was anymore, but he hated the fact that he had saved the Fairy Godmother the trouble of turning Fiona human again. He continued to stare sadly at the wall, wondering if he would ever see his wife again.....

* * *

Harold was not looking forward to the talk he was about to have with the Fariy Godmother. He still didn't have the nerve to tell her that he wanted to call the whole deal off. He had, however, come up with a reason why it wouldn't work. The Fairy Godmother would probably find a way around it, but it was the only possible way not to get on her bad side, yet still make Lillian happy. 

"Uh....excuse me, Fairy Godmother," Harold said tentatively.

The Fairy Godmother had been in her factory all morning, working hard to replace the many potions that Shrek had destroyed the day he took the Happily Ever After potion. It had all been worth it, for the potion had worked completely in her favor. When she heard Harold's voice, she was somewhat annoyed.

"Yes, Harold?" She said in the sweetest voice she could muster.

"Well, um, I just need to talk to you about a little.......problem with Fiona and Charming's marraige," Harold said.

"Come again?" The Fairy Godmother asked, with a little challenge in her voice.

"You see, I would be fine with Fiona and Charming getting married if it weren't for......" Harold started, but hesitated when he noticed the glare the Fairy Godmother was giving him. After a second, he continued, "the fact that Fiona is already married to.....the ogre."

The Fairy Godmother started to object, but suddenly realized that he was right. She had, of course, realized that Shrek and Fiona were still married, but had not thought of the effect that fact may have on Fiona and Charming. Fiona couldn't be married to two men at once, whether she knew she was or not. Not legally, anyway.

"Hmm....you're quite right, Harold," The Fairy Godmother conceded, "so I guess there are two things we can do."

Harold knew that this was coming. The Fairy Godmother always found a way around everything.

"Because the ogre will definetly not divorce Fiona," The Fairy Godmother said, "We can either kill him or find a way to make Shrek disappear."

As the Fairy Godmother said this, she suddenly came up with an idea. She did not need to kill the ogre, for he had kissed Fiona, thus making him permanently human. Killing a human would be murder, and not even the shifty Fairy Godmother would go that far, no matter how much she hated Shrek. No, she could handle it in another way. A way that would make everything easier for everyone.

"Just leave it to me, Harold" The Fairy Godmother said cheerfully, not noticing the disappointed look on Harold's face, "I'll fix everything. You can count on that."

"You -- you're not going to kill him, are you?" Harold asked. He already felt bad enough already, having done what he did to Shrek. Harold did not want to add to his guilt by actually having the poor guy killed.

"Oh, of course not, Harold," The Fairy Godmother exclaimed, to the great relief of King Harold, "There are smarter ways of dealing with it than that."

"What are you going to --" Harold started.

"Don't worry," The Fairy Godmother interrupted, "I'll handle everything. You just get your daughter ready for the wedding."

With this, the Fairy Godmother motioned for Harold to leave. Very reluctantly, Harold did as he was told, and sulked out of theroom. The moment he left, the Fairy Godmother's cheerful smile turned into a rathermischievous one. Why had she not thought of this before?

She looked at her ingredients for her potions, and when she was certain that she had the adequate amount of each ingredient, she began to create the potion needed for what she had in mind for the ogre. Although she had made this potion only a few times before, it did not take her long to finish it. Now all she had to do was find a way toconvincethe ogre to drink the potion. She realized that she would just have to trick him into drinking it.

' That shouldn't be too hard ' The Fairy Godmother thought, ' After all, he is just a stupid ogre.'

That night, she slept better than she had ever slept for quite a while.The next day, she was going to make sure that Shrek disappeared forever.

* * *

Shrek watched indifferently as all of the prison guards went to the front of the prison, leaving their posts. He didn't really care what they were doing, but he had nothing else to do except to watch them. 

At first, the guards had attempted to be somewhat nice to Shrek, trying to carry on polite conversation with the poor guy. After a few minutes of no responses, however, they seemed to have forgotten he was there. Not that he cared, but things were getting pretty lonely, not to mention boring, in the dungeon.

' Far Far Away must be a pretty law-abiding kingdom ' Shrek thought to himself, noticing that he was just about the only inhabitant in the whole prison.

After spending almost twenty-four hours in the prison, Shrek had had time to think and rationalize about the awful night before. He knew that he had very little hope of ever seeing Fiona again, much less winning her back. Each minute that passed, that little bit of hope faded a little. Now he doubted that he would even make it out of prison.

As if on cue, five prison guards walked into Shrek's cell, and started to unlock his chains.

"You've been bailed," A surly guard told a rather confused Shrek. After all of the chains were unlocked, Shrek fell to the floor. Rubbing his wrists, he wondered who would have any reason to bail him out. Before he could ask, however, the guards had left the cell. Shrek followed suit, until he was finally outside of the prison. From the position of the sun, it seemed to be about noon.

At first, while he was adjusting to the light, he couldn't see much. After a few seconds, his eyes were mostly adjusted, and he saw her. Shrek was shocked that this person, out of all people, had been the one to bail him out. He thenbecame angry. Of course she was not here to help him. This was all some kind of trap. He had been once again pulled into another one of the Fairy Godmother's traps, and it made him angry.

* * *

A/N: Uh-Oh. I bet you can't guess what's gonna happen!! Anyway, I want to thank my reviewers. Red and Gold Phoenix, Mandy of the Amoeba, BookRose, and HottStuffMelv, y'all are the greatest. Things are going to get a little complicated from now on, so it may take me just a little longer to update. Then again, maybe it won't. I guess it just depends. 


	3. An Offer He Can't Refuse

"An Offer He Can't Refuse"

* * *

A/N: Wow!! This fic's plothas changed so... much. But don't worry, I've pretty much have it figured out and I'll still update regularly. I'm really excited about this fic, and the next few chapters are actually almost done. I just need to do some editing. So expect some updates soon. Again, I really appreciate the reviews. There is one thing I'm worried about...if I get any of the characters out of character, please tell me. Well, please r&r. Enjoy!!

Disclaimer: I own no characters or plot from Shrek 2, Dreamworks does.

* * *

"YOU!!" Shrek yelled in shock and anger. He was tried to run, not wanting to fall any deeper into her trap than he already had, but the Fairy Godmother's two bouncer-like thugs seized his arms before he could get away. Considering that they were both about twice his size, there was not much he could do.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" The Fairy Godmother said with mock bewilderment, "Aren't you happy to be out of prison?"

"What do you want?" Shrek growled, struggling to escape the brutes' grasp, but to no avail.

"Come with me," The Fairy Godmother said sweetly, "and I'll tell you."

The Fairy Godmother flew into her carraige, while the two thugs half led and half dragged Shrek into the carraige behind her. Opposite the Fairy Godmother, Shrek was forced to sit in between them, while the Fairy Godmother smiled in amusement.

* * *

"Where could he have gone?" Donkey asked Puss as they left the prison. Shrek wasn't there when they had gone to bail him out, and they were somewhat ticked off by this. They had planned an escape and everything, but since Shrek wasn't there, needless to say it didn't work.

"Are you sure he wasn't in another cell?" Puss asked.

"Of course I'm sure," Donkey retorted, "I saw him there last night when I went to check on him."

"Then he must have escaped," Puss said, "but how could he have?"

"Well, you know Shrek," Donkey said, "He can get out of anything."

"Si, I guess that's true," Puss said.

"What I don't get is why all of those guards were sitting there eating donuts right outside of Shrek's cell," Donkey said, "While they had a prisoner on the loose."

"That's true, too" Puss exclaimed, "He couldn't have escaped. Someone must have bailed him out."

"Who would do that besides us?" Donkey asked.

Right on cue, Donkey and Puss saw and heard the Fairy Godmother's carraige fly right past their heads. It seemed to have just left the prison.

"Well that answers our question as to who bailed him out," Donkey said, "Now, let's go find out why." Donkey ran towards where the carraige was heading, Puss following suit.

* * *

Sitting silently in the carraige, the four passengers sat, staring at each other. Shrek had been glaring at the Fairy Godmother, while she continued to smile in amusement. Finally, she broke the silence.

"So...I'm sure you've heard that Fiona and Charming's wedding will take place next week, haven't you?" The Fairy Godmother asked, causing Shrek to wince slightly.

"I figured," Shrek said sadly, although there was more than a little anger in his voice, "Actually, I didn't think you would even bother with a wedding. I figured it would just be easier to use an "Illegally Married Because Fiona Was Forced To Fall In Love" potion instead a conventional wedding. I mean, a wedding is usually only used by people who AREN'T EVIL!!" Shrek yelled angrily. He knew that he must sound very immature, but after all the Fairy Godmother had put him through, he didn't really care whether he was handling things in a mature manner or not. He crossed his arms and sat back in his seat, pouting.

This amused the Fairy Godmother more than anything. She loved the fact that she had struck a chord, and especially loved that the ogre had responded like he had.

"Oh, sweetheart..." The Fairy Godmother said, "there's no reason to be like that. Don't you want what's best for Fiona? I know I do." The Fairy Godmother smiled sweetly.

Shrek rolled his eyes in response. He had heard that line before.

"Yeah right.... I'm sure that was ALL you were thinking about when you planned this whole thing, wasn't it?" Shrek responded sarcastically.

"Well, of course I had to think of my own son, too," The Fairy Godmother replied, "but don't you think that Fiona would be happier with someone who can give her everything she's always wanted?"

"Don't pull that crap on me again," Shrek yelled, "I already fell for it once, and believe me, you can't manipulate me again!!"

"I'm sorry to hear that," The Fairy Godmother said in a way that sent a shiver up Shrek's spine.

"Why do you care, anyway?" Shrek asked, "You already got what you wanted."

"Well, you see pigeon...." The Fairy Godmother said, "the only reason I care is because I want Fiona and Charming to be married."

"Ok...so...." Shrek said, not understanding what the Fairy Godmother was getting at.

"And the only thing standing in the way of that," The Fairy Godmother continued, "Is you."

Shrek thought about this for a moment. He thought of all the reasons he would be able to keep Charming from marrying Fiona.

"Does she remember me?" Shrek said, his hopes rising.

"Oh, don't flatter yourself," The Fairy Godmother said somewhat cruelly, "She hasn't even mentioned you ever since the ball."

Shrek's hope deflated.

"What I was talking about," The Fairy Godmother continued, "Is the fact that Fiona is still married to you, although she doesn't know it. Therefore, she cannot marry Charming yet......"

"And you think I'm going to help you out?" Shrek asked.

"I'll leave it up to you," The Fairy Godmother said with a challenge in her voice, "But either you help us....."

The Fairy Godmother looked to her two thugs, who had begun to crack their knuckles.

"Or we help ourselves" The Fairy Godmother said.

Shrek looked warily from the Fairy Godmother, to the thugs, and back.

"Oh yeah, well...." Shrek said as he started to stand up, but was cut off as one of the brutes pulled him back into his seat.

"I can take you," Shrek growled as he looked up at the thug, who looked to be about a foot taller than Shrek.

The carraige came to a stop at the Fairy Godmother's cottage. The two brutes seized Shrek's arms again, and forced him out of the carraige.

"Why don't we talk about this over tea?" The Fairy Godmother said sweetly, a wicked smile spreading across her face. It wouldn't be long now........

* * *

As Donkey and Puss neared the cottage, they noticed The Fairy Godmother get out of her carraige. Quickly, they hid behind a fallen log. When they saw Shrek being dragged out of the carraige by two extremely large men, Puss drew his sword and began to run to Shrek's aid.

"Woah, Puss," Donkey said, "You can't just run up and fight the Fairy Godmother with your little stick."

"But Boss needs help," Puss objected, "And the Fairy Godmother strikes no fear into Puss in Boots!!"

"Yeah, well, that evil witch will turn you into ' Mutt in Boots ' if you try to fight her now," Donkey said.

This shut Puss up. He ducked down behind the fallen log again.

"We have to find out why she brought Shrek here," Donkey said with authority, "Then we can figure out how to get him out."

Puss nodded in agreement and the two made their way towards the Fairy Godmother's cottage.

* * *

A/N: Can anybody figure out what the Fairy Godmother is going to do? Hmm..... 


	4. Trap or Escape Opportunity?

"Trap or Escape Opportunity?"

A/N: Things get going in this chapter!! YAY!!! Anyway, I really want y'all to tell me if some of the things that happen in this chapter are a bit off, although I sincerely hope that they aren't. This is the last chapter without any original characters in it, so enjoy it while you can. lol. Y'all enjoy!!!

* * *

Fiona gazed languidly over the horizon. She had been sitting next to her favorite apple tree by the lily pond all morning, trying to get away from the hustle and bustle in the castle. There hadn't been a calm moment there ever since before the ball, which had been an absolute disaster. 

It had been a whole day since the ball, and Fiona was getting impatient. She was ready to get married, but her father kept telling her that she would have to wait. Her mother had not said much to her since the ball. However, she seemed to notice her mother gaze at her sadly whenever she thought that Fiona wasn't looking. The only person she really had to talk to was Charming, which she had to admit, was probably one reason she needed to get away for a while. She adored Charming, make no mistake about that, but listening to him talk about himself all day was a little bit more than she could handle.

Fiona was still furious from the night of the ball. She couldn't believe how disrespectfully she had been treated by that man. Shrek, did he say his name was? Kissing her in front of her fiance!! He had had some nerve.

'Well, it was kind of sweet,' Fiona's inner voice said.

"There was nothing sweet about it!!" Fiona thought aloud, arguing with herself, "He had no right to do that and I'm glad he's been locked away."

However, there was something about the man at the ball that Fiona couldn't quite recognize, or ignore. He seemed to have loved her, even though she had no idea who he was. It was either that he was in love with her or he was a madman. He might've been both. Fiona couldn't quite put her finger on it, but something had happened during that ball. For a split second that night, Fiona felt as if she knew him. She had to keep reminding herself that it didn't really matter and shrug it off. He was more than likely just somebody from her past. An old friend, perhaps.......

* * *

Sitting opposite the Fairy Godmother at her desk, where she had given him a literature lesson only two days ago, Shrek stared distastefully at the tea that the Fairy Godmother had ordered Jerome to place in front of him. 

"I don't drink tea," Shrek said rudely, sitting back in his chair. He spared wary glances every now and then at the two thugs, who were now standing behind him, making sure that he couldn't make a run for it.

"Would you like something else, then?" The Fairy Godmother asked, playing the part of a good hostess.

"No," Shrek said curtly. He wasn't an idiot. He knew not to take anything the Fairy Godmother offered him.

The Fairy Godmother had anticipated that Shrek wouldn't drink the tea, nor anything else she offered him. In fact, she knew that there would not be a way to trick the ogre into drinking the potion without him figuring out what was going on, and the only way the potion would work was if she caught the ogre completely off guard. To get her plan to work, she would have to try another way.

"Well, as I was saying," The Fairy Godmother said, ignoring Shrek's rudeness, "you have a choice to make, sweetheart, and I do hope you choose to help us. I would feel absolutely awful if something were to happen to you." The Fairy Godmother smiled mischievously, as Shrek cast another sparing glance towards her two brutes.

"And what exactly would you want me to do?" Shrek asked.

"I need you to divorce Fiona without her knowing about it. It wouldn't be difficult, of course. Just a few signatures and you can go back to your swamp where you belong," The Fairy Godmother offered, "I'll even turn you back into an ogre again if you want."

"I'm sorry, Miss Godmother," Shrek said with mock politeness, "but I'm afraid I'll have to decline your gracious offer."

Shrek attempted to stand, but was forced to sit back down when two huge hands grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him painfully back into his chair.

Although the Fairy Godmother had known all along that Shrek would say no, she pretended to be disappointed.

"Oh, are you sure about that?" The Fairy Godmother said.

Shrek nodded in response, all the while glaring defiantly at the Fairy Godmother.

"Then I'm sorry that it has to be this way," the Fairy Godmother said, having to use every ounce of control inside of her to keep from laughing.

The two brutes behind him inched towards Shrek, but moved slightly to the right, giving him an opportuntiy to escape. Now was the moment of truth. If Shrek didn't take the opening, the Fairy Godmother would have to figure out another way to get him to take the potion. But if he did take the opening, there was no way that her plan could fail. That is, if the elf standing outside her office did his job right.

As the Fairy Godmother anticipated, Shrek took the opportunity to escape, and made a run for the door. He didn't even notice that there was nobody following him. All he knew was that he had to get out of the factory, and fast. As he made it out the door, he turned to the left. He thought he had gotten away until he made it only a few yards away from the door out of the factory, into the cottage. It was then that he felt a sharp pain in his left thigh......

* * *

Shrek's world began to spin. He grabbed the railing of the walkway to steady himself, but even that did not help him much. Looking down at his thigh, he saw a small hunting dart. The dart looked like something a hunter would use on a large animal to inject traquilizer into the poor creature. At first, Shrek was frightened, for he was getting dizzy and couldn't run any longer. After a few seconds, however, his fear subsided. Instead, it was replaced by a peaceful calm, and Shrek's muscles started to give in. As he fell to the floor, he hardly notice or care about the three figures making their way towards him.......

* * *

Donkey and Puss had heard everything that had gone on inside the Fairy Godmother's office. Thinking that Shrek was about to be attacked, the two friends started running towards the door of the cottage, not thinking about the consequences. They stopped, however, when they heard more voices coming from somewhere in the factory. They weren't angry voices, but they weren't coming from where the two animals had heard them before.

* * *

"Take him as far away from Far Far Away as you possibly can," The Fairy Godmother instructed the two thugs, "and make sure that whoever finds him doesn't have any neighbors. Also make sure that they don't, and most likely never will, know anything about the ball." 

The Fairy Godmother's plan had worked perfectly. The ogre had taken the bait, and the potion she had put in the dart had worked miraculously quick. It had been an unorthodox method, especially for the Fairy Godmother, to use a hunting dart instead of the way she normally tricked people into taking her potions. However, it had caught the ogre completely off guard, and had been easier than anything else she could have tried. Besides, this was an ogre!! There was no need to worry about being orthodox or civilized with him. Now all the Fairy Godmother had left to do was get the ogre as far away from Fiona as possible, and it would be as if this ordeal never even happened.

She looked down at the impotent ogre. He was still partially awake, but the potion had done its job.

'The poor creature thought he had gotten away,' The Fairy Godmother thought, grinning with satisfaction. She continued to grin down at Shrek, who stared at her as if he had never seen her before.

* * *

For a few moments, Shrek simply stared indifferently from the Fairy Godmother, to the thugs, and back. Slowly and steadily, he was slipping into unconsciousness. He attempted to fight whatever had been injected into him, but it was no use. The potion had already started to work, and with a great relenting sigh, the ogre finally surrendered to the sleep that had been calling his name.

* * *

After the voices in the factory could no longer be heard, Donkey and Puss started towards the factory once more. Once again, they were stopped, when they spotted the Fairy Godmother's two brutes drag Shrek out of the cottage and make their way towards one of the Fairy Godmother's spare carraiges.

At first, Donkey and Puss feared that they were too late, and Shrek was lost forever. As they gazed sadly at his limp body, however, they suddenly noticed that his chest was moving slightly. His breathing was slow, steady, and light. His face bore an expression that made it seem as if he was in the middle of a peaceful slumber, albeit one that brought on many nighmares. They continued to watch the scene intrusively, as the two thugs threw Shrek into the carraige and started it moving away from the factory.

More than a little confused, the two loyal friends started to follow the carraige. They did this mostly because they wanted to know where the thugs were taking Shrek, but they also wondered what the Fairy Godmother had done to their friend......

* * *

A/N: Good? Bad? Interesting? Boring? All reviews will help me, and make me very happy!!! 


	5. What Do We Do Now?

"What Do We Do Now?"

* * *

A/N: I know this chapter is short, but I just had to get it posted as soon as possible!! Thanks again to all of my reviewers!! Once again, y'all are the greatest!!

* * *

"Okay, here we go," King Harold said to himself as he looked across the room at his wife. He did not want to tell her about how his pathetic plan had failed miserably, but it had to be done. He had gotten himself into this mess and he would just have to face the consequences. 

"Lillian...dear...," Harold said tentatively.

Lillian turned to him and smiled, but he could see past her sweet demeanor. He knew that if she did nothear good news from him, there was going to be hell to pay.

"I just had a talk with the Fairy Godmother, and....." Harold said, wincing at the pleased look on his wife's face.

Harold suddenly lost the nerve to tell her the truth. He frantically tried to think of a way to get out of this mess in one piece.

"She said that she would fix the problem," Harold finally said. He realized that he wasn't really lying to Lillian, for that was what the Fairy Godmother had told him.

"Problem?" Queen Lillian asked, suprised,"The Fairy Godmother agrees that this whole ordeal is a problem?"

"You'll have to ask her that, dear," Harold said quickly, "All she told me was that she would fix the problem." He didn't want to say too much if he didn't have to. He knew that he wasn't telling his wife the truth, of course. However, he had also been able to keep from outright lying to her.

Lillian looked at her husband suspiciously. She could tell that he was keeping something from her.

"I think I will ask her," Lillian said.

Harold's eyes opened wide in horror.

'I am in deep trouble' he thought.

* * *

"Puss, will you keep it down?" Donkey hissed as hescurried through the woods. The twoloyal friendshad been forced to walk through the woods instead of on the road.This wastoavoid being seen by the two brutes that were taking Shrek to God knows where. One of the thugs was driving the carraige, looking utterly bored. This was probably because he had been driving forquite a few hours. Donkey and Puss could only guess that the other one was inside the carraige with Shrek, making sure that he didn't wake up. 

"You want me to be quiet?! What about you?! I'm suprised you haven't woken Boss up yet!!" Puss said sarcastically. He had been walking (and running) for hours, and he was not going to tolerate Donkey telling him what to do.

"They've stopped!!" Donkey yelled, ignoring Puss's remark. Puss winced slightly.

"Are you loco, burro?" Puss whispered, "They're going to see us."

Luckily, the two brutes did not seem to hear Donkey's outburst. Puss and Donkey watched asfirst thug climbed from the driver's seat of the carraige. The brute then went about the task of helping his accomplicehaul Shrek's somewhat cumbersome, still incapacitated,form out of the carraige. They had found the perfect spot, miles and miles away from Far Far Away. There wasonly one family in the area, and that is exactly what the Fairy Godmother had wanted. Now allthat hadbe donewas make sure that the family found him, preferably before he awoke.

As soon as the two thugs inconsiderately dumped Shrek on the ground, the one that had been driving began to tiehishands and feet together, making sure that the ogre would not be able to wander back to Far Far Away if he was to awake before he was found. They then pulled Shrek over to the side of the road, and left without a word.

* * *

"Bethie, hurry up!!" Evelyn Berwick yelled to her sister. 

It had been thirty minutes and Bethie still wasn't ready. It wasn't even as if she had anything to be ready for. They were only doing their daily chores.Besides,there weren't anyother boys or girlsanywhere near their house. Evelyn was used to this routine, however,for taking her time was what Bethie did best. Especially if she was doing her hair, which always seemed to take forever.

Being girls born into an isolated family was tough for Evelyn and Bethie, especially since theywere the only children of Bertha and Frank Berwick. Although Mr. and Mrs. Berwick loved their two daughters,it was a great disappointment to them that they had never had a son.

Twenty-year-oldEvelynwas the oldest of the two sisters.She had been the one born with the wit and charm of her father, but sadly lacking her mother's good looks. Her sister, Bethie, had been born three years after Evelyn, and had favored her mother where Evelyn did not. Bethie, however, did not have the charisma to talk her way out of any tough situation like her sister did. Instead, she learned that she could smile her way out of anything, for Bethie held all of the good looks that her sister mostly lacked. While Bethie was tall and thin, Evelyn was short and busty. Bethie had her mother's beautiful golden hair, while Evelyn had her father's thin red hair. It wasn't that Evelyn was not pretty, for she was, but she seemed quite plain if one were to look at her sister first.

Despite the fact that the two girls were so different, they were always inseparable. They couldn't diverge from each other if they wanted to, for they lived on small isolated farm in the middle of nowhere. There were no other children to hang out with, so they were quite stuck with each other. Luckily for them, they didn't mind. It may have been because this life actually suited them, as it did their parents, or it may have been for the fact that the two Berwick girls did not really know anything else. Whatever the reason was, the girls did not find any problem with the way they lived most of the time.

"I'm leaving without you!!" Evelyn yelled to her sister.

After this was said, Bethie hurried out of the house with an annoyed look on her face.

"You shouldn't rush perfection, you know," Bethie said half-jokingly. Evelyn let out an exasperated groan.

"Why do you have toplay dress up beforewe do our chores?" Evelyn asked, "It's not as if anyone besides Mum and Dad are going to see you."

The two girls began to walk down the dirt path that led to the apple trees about a mile from their home. The two girls loved to pick apples, but always bickered the entire time they traveled down the road.

"You can never be too careful," Bethie countered after a few moments of silence, "You never know who you might come across...."

* * *

"What do we do now?" Donkey asked Puss, as the two animals stared down at their friend, "He's too big for us to drag him all the way back to Far Far Away by ourselves, andwe have no ideawhen he'll wake up." 

"Then we should go back and bring help," Puss said, "We could bring The Big Bad Wolf and everybody else down here, and with all of the added strength, we should be able to getBoss back home."

Nodding hesitantly in agreement, Donkey started tocanter back to Far Far Away, but stopped. He felt so bad about leaving his buddy in such a impodent condition.

Donkey finally decided that nothing could be done for Shrek without the helpof the rest of their friends.

"Okay....but we have to hurry," Donkey said.

Puss began to run towards Far Far Away as fast as he could. Donkey looked once more at Shrek, and after seeing that he didn't look as if he would wake up any time soon, galloped after the spanish feline.

If Donkey had only stayed with Shrek a moment longer, he may have noticed the two women that were making their way down the road........

* * *

Like it? Hate it? Love it? Please review. 


	6. Who is He?

"Who is He?"

A/N: This was my funnest chapter to write yet. I don't know why, it just was. Thanks again for the reviews!! Y'all are the greatest. Please r&r and enjoy!!!

* * *

"Bethie, stop that!!" Evelyn laughed, as her sister began to hurl apples in her direction. Her sister never could pick apples without treating them like snowballs. Luckily, it ceased to bother Evelyn after years of putting up with it. 

"What are you going to do?" Bethie asked jokingly, putting her hands on her hips, "Sit on me?"

"Oh, you are going down, sister!!" Evelyn laughed, "You are so going down!!"

Evelyn scooped up five apples into her hands, andbegan to throw them at her sister. She was careful not to hurt her, however. Bethie had never been a very tough person, but was actually quite the crybaby. Evelyn got ready to throw her last apple, when she heard a sound.

This sound was unlike anything Evelyn had ever heard before. She could not quite distinguish whether it was a person or a wounded animal. It was a very deep groan, yet it was a pathetic whimper.

"Did you hear that?" Evelyn asked her sister, dropping the apple she held in her hand.

"Hear what?" Bethie questioned before stopping to listen, "I don't hear anything."

"Hmm.....it must have been my imagination," Evelyn said, picking up the apple that she had dropped.

The two girls resumed their apple picking, but Evelyn still kept her ears open for the sound. However, what she heard next was not the sound that she had heard before, but an ear-piercing scream.

"Oh my God!!" Bethie said from the other side of the path, "Evelyn, come here!!"

Evelyn did not have to be told twice. She ran as quickly as she could to the place where her sister was standing. When she got there, she let out an even more shrill scream than her sister had, as she stared down in horror at the body of a considerably attractive man.

"Is he dead?" Bethie asked.

"I don't think so," Evelyn answered, "No, his chest is moving. He's alive."

They stared down at the man for a few moments before Bethie finally broke the silence.

"We should go get Mummy and Daddy," she said, "They'll know what to do."

Nodding in agreement, Evelyn wordlessly started running towards her home. Just as quickly, her sister followed.

* * *

"Frank!! Get away from me," Bertha scolded her husband, nearly spilling the bucket of milk she was carrying from the barn. Her voice, however, was filled with laughter. 

"Aw, " Frank Berwick said playfully, as he enveloped his wife in his arms, "But I LOVE you, honey."

Frank was the typical farmer. He had big muscles and a somewhat heavy build,which came from his love of work and food. His short, messy red hair was always hidden by a hat, and he never wore anything other than overalls.The only thing that reallymade him differentfrom other farmers was his Irish accent. It always made his wife and daughters laugh whenever Frank would joke around and attempt to speak in a southern dialect, for he always sounded goofy when he tried.

Despite the way he liked his privacy, which was one of the many reasons the family lived in such isolation, Bertha never could have asked for a better husband. There never was a man who loved and cherished his family more.

Yes, Frank Berwick was a typical farmer, but he was an exceptional father and husband.

"You really need to start acting your age," Bertha laughed, throwing one arm around her husband's neck, "I don't need three children in this house."

Frank pretended to be insulted, pulling away from his wife and putting his hands on his hips.

"Fine, I'll act my age," Frank said, playfully sarcastic, "If you want me to sit and sleep on my rocker all day, that's fine with me."

Bertha rolled her eyes. Even though Frank was fifty years old like her, he always complained as if he were eighty, and acted as if he were twelve.

Seeing the annoyed look on his wife's face seemed to satisfy Frank. He smiled, kissed his wife affectionately on the cheek, and took the bucket of milk from her hand before ambling towards their house. Bertha fondly watched her husband leave. She loved him more than anything, and his quirkiness was merely part of his charm.

'He seemed so mature for his age when I met him," Bertha thought with a smile, 'What happened?'

After her husband had entered the house, Bertha started to head back to the barn, although she really did not have anything to do there. The cow had been milked. The family's mule, Franny, and the chickens had already been fed. Considering that she hadn't heard barking for a few moments now, she assumed that her husband had already fed their Great Dane, Petey. It was actually kind of nice to have the morning chores done so early, which almost never happened. Maybe there would finally be some time to just kick back and relax....

"Mum!! Dad!!" Bertha suddenly heard her two daughters yell, running towards the house.

'Or maybe not' Bertha thought.

Frank must have also heard their daughters yell, for he left the house and ran to where his wife was standing.

"I wonder what's got them so excited," Frank said.

Bertha shrugged as Evelyn and Bethie ran up to her and Frank, out of breath.

"Mum....Dad.....somebody....needs help," Bethie said, trying to catch her breath.

"Who?" Bertha asked.

"We don't know," Bethie and Evelyn said in unison, "We just found him on the side of the road."

Bertha and Frank exchanged confused glances.

"He's not moving," Evelyn said, annoyed that her parents weren't springing into action like she expected, "And we don't know what to do."

"Okay....we'll check it out," Frank said. He wasn't really sure what his daughters were talking about, but he had some time to at least check it out.

After exchanging another confused glance with each other, Bertha and Frank began walking towards the barn.

* * *

"Franny, get up," Frank said to their very dog-like mule. Franny was old, and really couldn't do any sort of work besides pulling their relatively small cart, but the Berwick family couldn't give her up if they tried. 

The mule looked at Frank blankly for a few seconds before rising to her hooves. She wasn't used to being woken up, especially this early in the morning.

"Come on, you lazy mule," Frank said, laughing, "Time to work....for once."

Frank went about the task of getting Franny hooked to the cart, while his wife emptied it of its contents. The last time they had used it was for harvesting, which had been a few weeks ago.

After Franny was hooked to the cart, Frank helped his wife into it before climbing into the driver's seat.

"Alright girls, come on," Bertha yelled towards the house, "Show us what you're talking about."

Bethie and Evelyn ran out of the house, followed by their Great Dane, who never let their father go anywhere without him.

The two girls and Petey hurriedly got into the cart, and the family started towards the apple trees.

* * *

"There!! Right there!!" Bethie yelled, spotting the person on the side of the road. 

"Oh my word," Bertha gasped, stepping out of the cart and running towards the man, "You girls weren't kidding."

Bertha looked up at her husband, who had made his way over to where his wife was, Petey in tow. He usually had a lot to say about everything, but he was silent now. All he did was simply stare at the man on the ground, until he finally found his voice.

"What do you think happened to him?" Frank asked his wife, "I mean, why on Earth is he all the way out here?"

Before Bertha could answer, Petey started to bark and growl. Although the family never had visitors, Petey was stillinstinctively protective of his masters.

"Petey, shush," Bertha scolded, looking crossly at the Great Dane. Petey immediately stopped barking, but continued to snarl and growl at the intruder.

When Bertha looked away from Petey, towards the fellow on the side of the road, she nearly shrieked when she saw two large brown eyes staring back at her.

The man looked absolutely frightened, as if he were a lost child. He was wearing a very princely, albeit muddy, outfit. He did not look like a prince, however, for his face and short brown hair were awfully dirty. Bertha's first instinct was to take the poor boy home and get him cleaned up. She was an experienced mother, after all.

Once again, Bertha looked to her husband for answers. Instead of looking back at her, however, Frank finally spoke up.

"What happened to you, lad?" Frankasked in a strong Irish brogue.

The "lad" merely sat up and shook his head, frowning. Breaking eye contact with the couple, he looked down on the ground, as if doing so would help him concentrate. He spent a few moments looking up and down the length of his body, as if he were fascinated by it. He stared at his bound hands and feet for a few seconds before once again looking upat Frank and Bertha. His eyes were no longer open wide in fright, but held a look of desperate inquiry, as if he were pleading the couple to answer his unspoken questions.

* * *

Evelyn and Bethie simply continued to stare in shock at the man. He fascinated them, for he was a stranger, and the girls reacted to him not unlike one would react to an alien from some foreign planet.

* * *

"What's your name, son?" Bertha asked in a motherly tone. This man did not look young enough to be completely trusted and treated like a child. He did, however, seem to be about twenty years her junior, and given his current condition, she felt deep compassion for the poor boy. 

At first, the family figured that the man could not speak, for he simply continued to stare at Frank and Bertha. However, they were all suprised when he timidly answered Bertha's question in a deep Scottish brogue.

"I was kind of hoping you could tell me," he said.

* * *

A/N:Dum! Dum!! Dum!!! :) 


	7. What Should We Do With Him?

"What Should We Do With Him?"

A/N: Okay, this is a pretty boring chapter and no other main characters (besides my original ones),other than Shrek (who isn't Shrek right now). Sorry! I just had to get this up before I got to the more interesting part. Don't worry; other characters will be all over the next chapter. You can count on that! Please r&r. Enjoy!

"Who am I?" the man asked in desperation.

The entire Berwick family looked to each other, at a loss for words. They really had not been expecting this, although they probably should have. Considering the fact that the boy was tied up in the middle of nowhere, the family assumed that he was very lucky to even be alive.

The fact that the man had no idea who he was upset Bertha more than anyone else, mostly because she didn't know who he was either. Being the kind of woman she was, she wanted more than anything to be able to tell him what he wanted to hear, and to help him get home.

Frank was upset also, but in a different way than his wife was. He figured that this poor boy must have been the victim of a mugging, kidnapping, or some other sort of foul play. This was the very reason why he kept his family miles away from places where people did things like this.

"You don't know, do you?" the man said in despair. He felt like a baby bird having just been hatched and introduced into the world. His life was literally in the hands of these people, and he had hoped that they would at least know who he was...

"I - I'm sorry, honey," Bertha said, near tears. She didn't even know this boy, and she could already feel her heart going out to him.

Frank looked down at the man and sighed. He didn't know what to do about this. He could either welcome this guy into his home and try to help him start over, or he could try to help him find out who he was. He would have much prefer the latter, but there were a few problems. One was the fact that he didn't even know where to start. The Berwicks did not exactly live close to any other town, village, or kingdom. In fact, it amazed Frank that this boy had gotten all the way out to their farm. Another problem with this idea was the condition this fellow was in. It was highly unlikely that any of this had been an accident, and this boy probably wasn't even meant to have been found.

"Do you remember anything, lad?" Frank ventured.

The man set his eyes and mouth in concentration for a few moments, as if in deep thought. After a while, however, he dropped his shoulders and sighed sadly.

"Nothing," he said, "Nothing at all."

Bertha's expression changed from one of sadness to one of motherly purpose. She kneeled until she was at eye-level with the man.

"It'll be okay, sweetheart," Bertha said gently to the fellow, softly running her hand through his hair, "We'll make sure that it will all be okay."

The man's look of fright and despair was briefly replaced by one of relief and gratitude. He had never met Bertha, or at least he didn't think he had. Either way, he still couldn't help but trust and rely on her as if she were his own mother.

Rising to her feet, Bertha turned to her husband. Grabbing his sleeve, she pulled him to the other side of the road. Their daughters quietly followed. Petey, who had been watching the man with scrutiny, briefly looked to his masters. He debated whether to follow them, or to stay and guard the stranger that had so rudely intruded on his property. He decided on the latter, growling warningly at the intruder once again.

Now that Bertha and Frank had left his side, the man was suddenly aware of Petey's presence. The dog, which seemed to be the size of a small horse, intimidated him. He cowered slightly, attempting to get as far away from the beast as he could, silently praying that the family would come back soon.

Meanwhile, on the opposite side of the road, the family had finally gotten out of earshot of the fellow.

"Well?" Bertha whispered to her husband, crossing her arms over her chest, "What are we going to do about this?"

"I don't know," Frank sighed, "We should probably see if we can find his family, I guess."

"Oh, I wish we could," Bertha said, troubled, "But you know as well as I that we have little to no chance of finding anyone that would even know him. I mean, there aren't even any villages near here, and even if there were, we still wouldn't have a good chance of finding his family! That is, if he even has one."

"We should take him home, then," Evelyn, who had been uncharacteristically quiet up until now, said, "At least until he gets his memory back, I mean."

Bertha and Bethie nodded in agreement, looking to Frank. Instead of agreeing as they had expected, Frank looked on the ground and scratched his head, in deep thought.

"Frank?" Bertha asked, surprised that her husband was hesitating.

Frank looked up at his wife and smiled.

"Of course we should take him home, honey," Frank said, but then looked worriedly into her eyes, "It's just that...I know how you are, sweetheart," Frank looked to his daughters as well, "I know how all of you women are. I mean, what are you going to do when he finally gets his memory back and leaves?"

"We'll be happy for him!" the three women yelled in unison, "What do you think we'll do, be upset?"

Frank looked at all three of his girls with an expression that silently told them that yes, that is exactly what would happen. Frank then turned towards his wife.

"Honey, you're such a wonderful mother, and you have a tendency of wanting to be a wonderful mother to...everybody," Frank laughed softly, "But if you don't think you'll get attached to the lad, then by all means, we'll take him home."

"Good Lord, Frank, you make him sound as if he's a lost puppy," Bertha said with a groan, "I mean, I'm not that selfish to want to keep him with us when he finally learns who he really is. I'm just saying that we should take care of him until that time comes."

"Yeah, I know," Frank stated, draping an arm around his wife's shoulders.

After saying this, Frank, with his arm now placed across his wife's shoulders, led her to the other side of the road. Bethie and Evelyn ran after them, annoyed that they kept getting ignored. When the family got to the other side of the path, Frank pulled away from his wife. It was now his turn to be the one to kneel at eye-level with the man.

Frank wordlessly started to untie the fellow's binds, earning himself a confused stare from the boy. After succeeding in untying the ropes that had bound the man's hands and feet together, Frank figured that he should try to communicate with him.

"Can you stand, boy?" Frank asked. Instead of responding, the man attempted to lift himself from the ground, having to grab onto the nearest tree to keep his balance. Frank had to grab Petey, who was now barking wildly with anger, by his collar to keep him from biting the poor boy's leg.

Considering how awkward the man seemed to be standing, it seemed obvious that he would most likely not be able to walk, at least for a while. As he let go of the tree, the fellow suddenly lost his balance and began to fall towards the ground. Every member of the Berwick family began to come to his aid, attempting to stop his fall. After he hit the ground, however, the family stopped and stood where they were when the man shook his head and began to rise again.

"No…I can do this," the fellow said, "I just need to—." He was cut short when he suddenly fell once again. He got back up just as quickly as he had fallen, surprising the Berwick family with his doggedness. It took him at least seven tries before the man finally stood on his own, although he was still quite awkward. The whole scene reminded Bertha of a two year old attempting to stand for the first time, for this was what the man looked like at the moment.

Although the fellow had succeeded in standing on his own, there was still the matter of walking that still needed to be dealt with. If he had been graceless before, he was downright ungainly in his attempt to walk. Very slowly, and very uncomfortably, he made his way towards the road where the cart was. To the amazement of the family, he made it all the way without falling, although there were many times where he had come dangerously close.

"See…I told…you I could…do it," the man said, out of breath. It amazed him that something that had seemed so simple could be so hard and tiring. However, it made him feel good to have accomplished his great feat, and he contently collapsed onto the cart, trying to catch his breath. Meanwhile, Frank and Bertha gazed from each other, to the man, and back. It seemed that this fellow was not as scared and helpless as he had first seemed.

The Berwick family walked towards the man, who was lying comfortably in the cart, but still staring back at them with inquiry. He seemed to be silently asking what the family was going to do with him.

"Well, what do you want to do?" Frank asked the man, thinking it best to ask him rather than assume that what Bertha wanted was what he really wanted. The man seemed to think for a minute about his answer, until he finally found the right words to express what it was he truly coveted.

"I just want to go home," he said.


	8. Confrontations

A/N: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, ect…… Wow, you were wondering whether I was still alive or not, weren't ya? I had the worst writer's block in the history of writer's blocks! Believe me, I've been trying to write, but I finally decided, after a couple reviews from Cathy wink wink, to just sit down and write until I had a chapter written, and although it took me a while, it's finally here. Now, my chapters will be coming more regularly, and I will finish. However, my chapters won't be coming as often as they were before my writer's block, but I'm shooting for weekly chapters. Hopefully. Again, I'm sorry. I know it must have been terribly annoying have a half finished story gathering dust. Well, as I said, I'll try harder to update more often, and I hope you enjoy this chapter.

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Disclaimer: All characters and circumstances from Shrek and Shrek 2 belong to Dreamworks, not me. 

**Confrontations

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'Charming, just leave me alone,' Fiona thought as she sat in the highest tower of her palace. She inwardly winced as she heard Charming call her name again, and again, and again. A small, exasperated groan emanated from her lips as she put her head in her hands. In the beginning of her and Charming's relationship, she had come running to his side like a lovesick puppy every time he had called her name. However, after a week of "I used new conditioner today, can you tell?" and "Do these pants make me look fat?" and other pointless questions and statements of the like were enough to drive her insane, even if she did love him. The fact that she loved Charming was one of the many things that Fiona did not understand lately. Why did she love him? What was so lovable about him? He was the vainest person she had ever met in her life, which was saying a lot since she did live in a royal court. Nothing about him, save perhaps his breathtaking good looks, appealed to her at all, and it annoyed her that she couldn't even be excited about their wedding anymore, since whenever it was mentioned, politics always came up. In fact, every day that went by made her dread her wedding more and more. She felt as if she was betrothed to Charming instead of in love with him. She had to keep assuring herself that she was indeed marrying for love instead of for looks or politics. She was marrying Charming because marrying him would make her life comfortable and conflict- free. She was marrying him because she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, because she loved him.

"Fiona!" Charming's velvety voice exclaimed from below for the hundredth time.

"Oh God," Fiona groaned as she brought her knees to her chest and placed her face in her hands.

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"Charming, please stop that yelling pumpkin, and calm down," The Fairy Godmother exclaimed to her son, "I already told you that your hair looks fine. Why do you always need a second opinion?" 

"I have to know what my fiancé thinks, mother," Charming said matter-of-factly, "But I suppose I should calm down a bit. I mean, it's not as if she's going to tell me anything other than my hair is fabulous." Charming stopped for the tenth time to admire himself in the mirror.

The Fairy Godmother rolled her eyes jokingly, and flew out of the room. Charming was going to take a while. Just as the Fairy Godmother came out the door, she nearly collided with Queen Lillian. Both Queen Lillian and the Fairy Godmother shrieked in surprise.

"Your Majesty, please forgive me. I didn't see you." The Fairy Godmother said sweetly.

"Oh, Fairy Godmother, it's quite all right," Lillian replied just as sweetly, "Actually, I was just looking for you. Do you mind if we…chat over tea. There's something I want to discuss with you."

"Of course, Your Majesty, whatever you desire." The Fairy Godmother said. She inwardly winced as she flew beside the queen out to the courtyard, dreading the heated argument she knew was coming.

When the two women entered the courtyard, Queen Lillian did not bother to wait for the tea to be poured.

"Fairy Godmother, I am so confused. What has happened to my daughter? What have you done to her?" Lillian exclaimed. Although she had already heard the truth, supposedly, from Harold, she wanted to hear it from the Fairy Godmother.

"I've done nothing to your daughter, Your Majesty. All I did was help her see reason." The Fairy Godmother replied.

Figuring that she wasn't going to get the truth from the Fairy Godmother, Lillian decided to take a slightly different approach.

"I know about everything, Fairy Godmother, so please don't lie to me. Although I have been ignorant throughout most of this ordeal, I am certainly not stupid!" Lillian exclaimed angrily.

The servants who had finished serving the tea, while being ignored by the monarch and fairy at the table, began to back away, not wanting to draw attention to themselves.

The Fairy Godmother gaped at her. Who was this woman? This certainly couldn't be the sweet, placid queen she had met and known for years. This was someone else entirely. This was…

"I am a mother!" Lillian said, interrupting the Fairy Godmother's thoughts, "And I demand to know why you have done this horrible thing to my daughter and son-in-law!"

After a few moments, the Fairy Godmother found her voice.

"Your Majesty, being a mother yourself, you must know that we do what we feel is best for our children." The Fairy Godmother said softly and somewhat nervously, "Sometimes a mother has to take extreme measures to make our children happy."

"But sometimes a mother just needs to butt out of other people's lives!" Lillian yelled as she hit the table with surprising strength, nearly knocking over the tea.

The Fairy Godmother stared at the queen in shock for a split second before suddenly getting angry.

"Wait just a bloody moment! You and your husband were the ones who brought me into Fiona's life in the first place, or did you just forget that little tower incident?" The Fairy Godmother yelled.

"Yes, that was a big mistake on our part, but our mistake does not give you the right to decide who my daughter marries or what goes on in my family." Queen Lillian exclaimed, "Why, you're nothing more than an intrusive, lying, scheming, wicked….."

Before Lillian could get any more adjectives in, she spotted Harold trying to make his way into the castle undetected.

"Harold!" Lillian yelled, now directing her attention towards her husband.

Harold noticeably winced, and tentatively turned toward his wife.

"Come here, now!" Lillian ordered.

Harold made his way slowly to the table in the courtyard where his wife and the last person he wanted to see at the moment were sitting.

"We were just talking about you, dear," Lillian said with mock sweetness, "Why don't you tell me again how you betrayed our daughter and participated in this dreadful scheme, and why don't you also tell me the truth as to our son-in-law's whereabouts?"

Harold simply stared at his wife and stammered stupidly. The queen rolled her eyes and quickly redirected her attention back to the Fairy Godmother, to the great relief of her husband.

"Why don't you tell me, Fairy Godmother?" Queen Lillian said in an almost threatening tone, "I'm just dying to know."

The Fairy Godmother, no longer in shock because of the queen's uncharacteristic behavior but angered because of the queen's disrespect, had no trouble finding her voice.

"I'm sure you do want to know, Your Majesty," The Fairy Godmother replied with mock politeness, "Hmm…maybe we can come up with some….agreement and both get what we want."

"What are you talking about?" Queen Lillian said softly, narrowing her eyes in annoyance.

I'll tell you," The Fairy Godmother said, while glancing menacingly at King Harold, "but why don't we discuss this in private, Your Majesty, and we'll discuss the terms of the agreement."

"The TERMS!" The monarch nearly screamed, "There are no terms to discuss. I demand that you tell me what I want to know!"

"If you want to know where your precious ogre is," The Fairy Godmother said, sarcasm tingeing her voice, "Then my son and I are getting something out of it."

How dare you!" The queen said loudly, "What, are you holding him for ransom, now!" The queen laughed briefly at the ridiculousness of the entire conversation.

Queen Lillian and the Fairy Godmother continued to argue for nearly ten minutes while King Harold watched uncomfortably. As the argument started getting more and more ludicrous, the king decided to attempt to intervene.

"Ladies, ladies, why don't we –," The king started, but was quickly stopped by the ominous glares both his wife and the Fairy Godmother threw his way.

"Perhaps you're right, Fairy Godmother," Queen Lillian said, still glaring at her husband, "maybe we should discuss this in private."

The two adversaries made their way without a word into the castle, to the great relief of King Harold. When Harold saw the castle's main entrance close, he put his head in his hands.

"What have I done?" He whispered to himself, the twinge of regret and sorrow cutting through his heart like a knife.

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A/N: Good? Bad? Hmm? Please don't forget to review, if there are still any readers out there after my long absence.  


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